The Psychology of Addiction: Why It’s Not About Willpower or Weakness
Addiction is often misunderstood.
Many people assume addiction is about a lack of willpower — that if someone really wanted to stop, they would. But from a psychological perspective, addiction is rarely about weakness.
In this episode of the Blokes Podcast, Craig sits down with psychologist Jeremiah Belina to explore the psychology of addiction — what causes it, what drives it, and what real recovery actually looks like.
Is Addiction About Willpower?
One of the most common myths about addiction is that people simply need more discipline.
But addiction is not just a behaviour problem. It’s often a coping strategy.
From alcohol and drugs to gambling, pornography, gaming, food, or work — addictive behaviours frequently serve a psychological function. They can temporarily reduce anxiety, numb emotional pain, distract from trauma, or create a sense of relief when someone feels overwhelmed.
Instead of asking:
“Why can’t they just stop?”
A more useful question is:
“What is this behaviour helping them cope with?”
This shift — from blame to understanding — is central to the psychology of addiction.
What Causes Addiction?
Addiction usually develops when something provides reliable short-term relief.
It might:
- Reduce stress
- Numb emotional pain
- Help someone avoid difficult feelings
- Provide a sense of connection or escape
- Offer temporary control in chaotic circumstances
Over time, the brain learns that this relief works — even if only briefly. The behaviour becomes reinforced. What started as coping can gradually turn into dependence.
Understanding what causes addiction means looking beneath the surface behaviour and exploring the emotional drivers underneath.
Addiction and Emotional Pain
Many forms of addiction are closely linked to unresolved emotional pain.
This might include:
- Trauma
- Chronic stress
- Relationship difficulties
- Shame
- Loneliness or disconnection
- Identity struggles
When we view addiction through this lens, it becomes less about moral failure and more about human vulnerability.
Shame often keeps people stuck. Compassion creates space for change.
Recognising addiction as an attempt to cope allows people to seek support without feeling judged or defective.
What Does Addiction Recovery Really Look Like?
Recovery is not simply about abstinence.
Sustainable addiction recovery often involves:
- Identifying underlying emotional pain
- Building healthier coping mechanisms
- Strengthening supportive relationships
- Developing emotional regulation skills
- Reducing shame and self-criticism
Recovery takes courage. It often requires professional support, honest self-reflection, and connection with others.
But change is possible.
And it doesn’t begin with willpower.
It begins with understanding.
Listen to the Episode
In this episode, Craig and Jeremiah discuss:
- Why addiction isn’t simply a choice
- The psychological function of addictive behaviours
- How shame fuels addictive cycles
- What meaningful recovery actually involves
Whether you’ve experienced addiction yourself, supported someone through it, or want to better understand the psychology behind it, this conversation offers thoughtful insight and hope.
If You Need Support
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction or feeling unsafe, please reach out for support — to a trusted person, your GP, or a qualified mental health professional.
You don’t have to face it alone.
