Lacking Motivation? Learn How to Motivate Yourself

We all know the feeling - wanting to get something done, but just… not doing it. Maybe it’s going to the gym, finishing a uni assignment, cleaning the house, or finally replying to that email. You tell yourself you’ll get to it later. Then later becomes tomorrow. Then next week. And before you know it, you’re labelling yourself as lazy, unmotivated, or undisciplined.

But what if the issue isn’t a lack of motivation, but a misunderstanding of what motivation really is?

In this article, we’ll explore how motivation works, why it can feel so elusive, and what you can do to find it, keep it, and use it to move forward - even when everything feels hard.

What Is Motivation?

Motivation is the mental and emotional force that drives you to act. It’s what pushes you to chase goals, meet deadlines, build habits, and make changes in your life. But motivation isn’t just a personality trait or something you “either have or don’t.” It’s fluid. It shifts depending on your environment, mental state, energy, stress levels, and sometimes, your subconscious survival instincts.

So, if you find yourself constantly asking, “What is motivation and why don’t I have any?”, you’re not alone. The real answer lies in learning how your brain prioritises action.

Why You Might Feel a Lack of Drive and Motivation

Here’s a truth bomb: You're never truly “unmotivated.” You’re always motivated, just not always in the direction you want to be.

Let’s say your alarm goes off at 6 am so you can go to the gym. You hit snooze. Was that a lack of motivation? Not exactly. You were probably more motivated to stay warm and rested than to exercise. In that moment, comfort took precedence over long-term goals.

We often label ourselves harshly when we don’t act in line with our plans. However, the reality is that we’re motivated by competing needs. And depending on what’s going on in your mind and body, those needs can shift without you even realising it.

The Brain Science Behind Motivation

Understanding how to motivate yourself means understanding what’s happening in your brain. Motivation isn’t magic - it’s neuroscience.

Two key brain systems play a role here:

The Prefrontal Cortex (a.k.a. Your Conscious Brain)

This is the part responsible for planning, focus, goal-setting, and emotional regulation. It’s where discipline and decision-making live. When you’re feeling clear-headed, intentional, and productive, you’re likely operating from this space.

The Amygdala & Survival System (a.k.a. Your Primitive Brain)

This system is built for instinct and safety. It scans for danger, triggers fear and stress responses, and influences quick, emotional decisions. It evolved to help us survive in threatening environments. But in modern life, it can misfire - responding to emails, social pressure, or burnout as if we’re in danger.

Here’s the kicker: your primal brain can hijack your motivation before you even realise it. That’s why you can genuinely want to study or exercise, but still find yourself scrolling on your phone or bingeing on Netflix. Your brain might be prioritising comfort, safety, or escape from overwhelm, without your permission.

You’re Not Lazy - You’re Wired for Survival

When you’re in a state of chronic stress, anxiety, or emotional burnout, your brain isn’t trying to help you thrive - it’s trying to help you survive.

This might show up as:

• Struggling to get out of bed
• Procrastinating on simple tasks
• Cancelling plans or therapy sessions
• Feeling numb or disconnected
• Losing interest in things you used to enjoy

It’s not that you don’t care. It’s that your brain is working overtime to protect you, even if the outcome looks like withdrawal or avoidance. If you’ve experienced trauma, burnout, or long-term stress, this response can become your default. It’s a learned survival pattern - not a personal failing.

Understanding this is the first step in regaining motivation.

Motivation Isn’t Always a Feeling - Sometimes It’s a Choice

One of the biggest myths about motivation is that it has to strike first, like a lightning bolt. You wait for the “right moment,” the right energy, the right headspace. But the truth? Action often precedes motivation, not follows it.

Think of motivation like a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. The trick is not to wait until you “feel like it.” The trick is to start small - really small.

How to Motivate Yourself (Even When You Don’t Feel Like It)

Here are some science-backed strategies that can help you rebuild motivation when it’s missing in action:

1. Start (Ridiculously) Small

If studying for two hours feels impossible, start with two minutes. If you want to get back into exercising, try putting on your shoes and stepping outside. The goal isn’t perfection - it’s momentum.

2. Acknowledge Competing Motivations

Instead of shaming yourself for not doing the thing, ask: “What was I motivated to do instead?” Rest? Avoid stress? Feel safe? Bring that awareness into the next decision.

3. Interrupt the Autopilot Response

Next time you feel like checking out, try to pause - even for a breath. That moment gives your conscious brain a chance to step in and redirect your focus. That’s the first step to building intentional habits.

4. Work With, Not Against, Your Energy

Match your task list to your actual capacity. If you're low on energy, prioritise simpler tasks. Being “self-motivated” isn’t about pushing through everything - it’s about working smart with what you’ve got.

How to Motivate Yourself to Study or Exercise (When You’d Rather Do Anything Else)

Study and physical activity both require cognitive energy, focus, and long-term thinking, which can be hard to access when your brain is under pressure.

Here’s how to make it easier:

Studying:

• Break study into 15-minute “sprints”
• Study in a new location to trigger novelty
• Pair study time with something enjoyable (music, coffee, sunlight)
• Stop aiming for perfection - start aiming for progress

Exercising:

• Choose a movement that feels good, not punishing
• Prep the night before (clothes, shoes, plan)
• Join a friend or group to add accountability
• Focus on the after feeling - not the effort itself

These aren’t just lifestyle tweaks - they’re neuro-friendly ways to outsmart your primitive brain and rebuild trust in your ability to take action.

How to Remain Motivated Over Time

It’s one thing to get motivated. It’s another to stay motivated, especially when life throws curveballs or mental health challenges flare up.

So, if you’ve been asking yourself, “How can I stay motivated when things keep changing?” or “Why does my drive disappear after a few good days?” - you’re not failing. You’re human.

Here’s how to build long-term, self-sustaining motivation that aligns with your values and capacity:

1. Build Routines Around Your Energy, Not Against It

Instead of trying to squeeze into rigid “motivation hacks,” create rhythms that match your natural flow. Are you more alert in the morning? Do deep work then. Feel drained after 3 pm? Schedule lighter tasks or movement. Motivation isn’t about doing everything - it's about doing what matters when it makes sense.

2. Reconnect to Your 'Why'

Your brain is more likely to stay on task when the goal feels meaningful and relevant. Remind yourself why you’re studying, exercising, parenting, healing, or showing up at all. Your why might be different from someone else’s - and that’s okay. Personal meaning is the fuel that drives long-term motivation.

3. Track the Small Wins

You don’t need a massive change to stay engaged. In fact, small, repeated successes are what build a motivated mindset. Note down three things you achieved each day, no matter how minor. This helps your brain shift from “I’m not doing enough” to “I’m moving forward.”

Discipline vs. Motivation: Which One Do You Really Need?

There’s a lot of talk about discipline being “better” than motivation, as if willpower alone is the answer. But that idea oversimplifies a very complex system.

Motivation is about what drives you - your emotions, values, brain chemistry, and environment.

Discipline is about your ability to take action consistently, even when you don’t feel like it.

But here’s the thing: both can be trained. And neither exists in a vacuum.

If your nervous system is dysregulated, or if you’re experiencing a lack of drive and motivation due to stress, trauma or depression, discipline will be near-impossible to maintain. Not because you’re lazy, but because your brain isn’t functioning at full capacity.

So instead of relying solely on “discipline,” focus on creating safety, routine, and self-compassion first. When you feel grounded, self-motivation becomes easier and more sustainable.

When Lack of Motivation Is a Sign of Something Deeper

Sometimes, the issue isn’t just how to get motivation; it’s why it disappeared in the first place.

If you’re experiencing any of the following for more than two weeks, it might be worth speaking to a mental health professional:

• Persistent low mood or fatigue
• Disinterest in activities you used to enjoy
• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
• Social withdrawal or isolation
• Physical symptoms like headaches, stomach issues, or sleep disruption
• Self-criticism, shame, or thoughts of worthlessness

This could be a sign of underlying depression, anxiety, or burnout, not a motivation issue. At Blokes Psychology, we support men through all of this because mental health and motivation are closely intertwined.

You’re Not Broken - Your Brain Is Trying to Help

If you’ve ever said, “I just can’t get motivated,” what you might actually mean is: “I feel overwhelmed, stuck, disconnected, or scared.”

The solution isn’t to shame yourself into doing more. It’s to understand what’s going on beneath the surface and respond with awareness and intention.

Let’s recap what really helps:

• Motivation isn’t a lightning bolt - it’s a pattern you can train
• Your brain’s survival system is designed to protect you, not push productivity
• Tiny, intentional actions build momentum
• Your capacity fluctuates - and that’s okay
• Self-compassion is more powerful than self-criticism
• Support makes a difference

Whether you're struggling with motivation to study, motivation to exercise, or simply feel like your self-motivation has vanished, there is a way forward. It starts with shifting the question from “Why can’t I?” to “What’s getting in the way - and how can I respond differently?”

Need Support with a Lack of Motivation? We're Here.

At Blokes Psychology, we understand that a lack of motivation is rarely just about laziness. It’s often a symptom of deeper stress, emotional fatigue, or a nervous system that’s been in survival mode for too long.

If you're ready to stop blaming yourself and start building a healthier, more sustainable relationship with motivation, we’re ready to help.

Visit us at our Melbourne clinics in Cheltenham, Hawthorn, or Scoresby, or access our services via Telehealth anywhere in Australia.

Book a session to take the first step.

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